Having had one son sitting A levels and the other one doing his GCSEs this year, it was always going to be an interesting couple of months, but I am pleased to say that we have survived it, and can now look forward to receiving those results in August. My youngest sat his final exam yesterday, and so (as promised) I took him to Pizza Hut, where he was allowed to order a pizza 3 times the size of his head. My other son (and 3 friends) are sampling the delights of Berlin as we speak.
Very often when we look forward to something (in this case the end of exams) there can be a massive anti-climax, and I know that for my boys and their peers this is the case, to a certain extent. It seemed sometimes that there was no end in sight and I know that many have been counting the days of to their final exam, when they can kick back and relax. When that day finally comes, there is sometimes a sense of emptiness, as they just feel quite flat.
This can also be the case when we are constantly striving for something which always seems out of our grasp, we tell ourselves that everything will be perfect when we lose the 2 stone, or when we have paid off all the debts, or decorated the whole house. So, in this way we never quite allow ourselves to live in the present, but always looking to the future to provide us with answers.
I always advise people that life is for living NOW, not when you have 'emptied the in-tray'. The ability to live every moment fully and with awareness is a skill which, when perfected, can lead to a wonderful sense of peace and contentment. Like any skill, it needs constant practice but, once mastered, can be truly amazing in its effects.
Many of the clients that I see really enjoy being in the state of hypnosis, as they can start to experience this wonderful sense of peace of just being in the moment, leaving all worries, cares and anxieties outside the door.
If you would like to experience how hypnotherapy can help you to live for today, do come along and see me this Saturday - I will be with my colleagues from the complementary medicine centre at an Open Day at Eye Hospital and would be delighted to chat with you about the work that I do. If you need to contact me, I am available on 01449 780352 or 0781 7158429, or you can email me on wendy@wendychalk.co.uk. I look forward to seeing you!
Oh, and well done all those of you (and their families) who have endured those dreaded exams!
Wendy x
Thursday, 28 June 2012
Tuesday, 19 June 2012
Right to die?
My heart goes out to Tony Nicklinson, the former doctor suffering 'locked-in' sydrome after a massive stroke in 2005, as he has just had his request for the right to end his life refused by the high court. Tony, a previously very active and very outgoing man who lived his life to the full, has campaigned (along with his family) to have the ability to instruct his GP or another doctor to end his life. He feels that he has no quality of life at all, and his family are supporting him in his wish for a dignified end. It seems that, for the moment at least, this is a step too far for this country.
Whatever you feel about this case, it brings home to you how quickly circumstances can change, and how we can find ourselves in situations in which we have very little control. Life is precious, but I believe that the right to say goodbye if the quality of our life is so poor should be down to the individual, and if, as in Tony's case, he faces possibly another 30 years of this, surely he should be allowed to end his life in a dignified and gentle way, with his family and loved ones around him.
I know that there are many people who will have opposing views to myself, and this is a controversial issue, but it also brings home to the fact that we should be so thankful if we have good health, and live every day to the full as long as we are able.
All the best,
Wendy x
Whatever you feel about this case, it brings home to you how quickly circumstances can change, and how we can find ourselves in situations in which we have very little control. Life is precious, but I believe that the right to say goodbye if the quality of our life is so poor should be down to the individual, and if, as in Tony's case, he faces possibly another 30 years of this, surely he should be allowed to end his life in a dignified and gentle way, with his family and loved ones around him.
I know that there are many people who will have opposing views to myself, and this is a controversial issue, but it also brings home to the fact that we should be so thankful if we have good health, and live every day to the full as long as we are able.
All the best,
Wendy x
Wednesday, 6 June 2012
Diamond years
I hope that you have all enjoyed the 4-day weekend in honour of the Queen's jubilee. Despite slightly dodgy weather, it was lovely to see the whole country come together to celebrate, and there seemed to be a real groundswell of love directed towards the Queen, who, it has to be said, has served her country loyally and well. For somebody well into her eighties, she seems to be in an excellent state of health and still able to fulfil a punishing work schedule. Some of you may say that she has had a comparatively easy life with endless privelege and, whilst this may be true, it is still astounding how she carries on year after year, with a determined stoicism, in the service of her country.
The Queen clearly has a strong sense of duty and purpose, and it is my belief that this is a major factor in keeping well as we approach old age. If our lives lose meaning, we can then find that we feel somehow useless and detached from the community around us. It is my great privilege to have some older clients, and I find that I am endlessly inspired by them, and the circumstances that they have encountered in their lives. Depression is actually quite common and little recognised in old age (as it can be mistaken for other conditions), and it is usually a result of a number of factors which can include bereavement, poor physical health, loneliness and loss of purpose.
In my view, the greatest of these is loss of purpose, although some would argue against this. However I really feel that if somebody has a purpose in life, however trivial this may seem (looking after a beloved pet would count) then this tends to lessen the negative affect of the other difficulties.
Us baby boomers know that we will still be working till a ripe old age, but I do not necessarily think this is a bad thing. As long as we are able to work, I think we should be allowed to continue. Obviously a balance needs to be struck, and we should be mindful that we may not be able to do the same hours as we did in our 20s, but there is no reason to stop at 65 if we still feel able to carry on.
Society is changing, people are generally healthier and living for longer and the old days of getting the gold watch and then settling down in slippers to watch the snooker are well and truly over. Many retired people are finding that, even if they have their health and the support and companionship of a partner, unless they still feel a sense of usefulness (whatever form this may take) then something seems to be missing from their lives.
Evidently, the important thing is to strike a balance - to have time to relax and do those things that are enjoyable for us, and we know that in the case of the Queen it is her family and her love of her dogs and horses - but also to feel that we are still able to contribute to society in some way.
Best wishes to you all,
Wendy x
The Queen clearly has a strong sense of duty and purpose, and it is my belief that this is a major factor in keeping well as we approach old age. If our lives lose meaning, we can then find that we feel somehow useless and detached from the community around us. It is my great privilege to have some older clients, and I find that I am endlessly inspired by them, and the circumstances that they have encountered in their lives. Depression is actually quite common and little recognised in old age (as it can be mistaken for other conditions), and it is usually a result of a number of factors which can include bereavement, poor physical health, loneliness and loss of purpose.
In my view, the greatest of these is loss of purpose, although some would argue against this. However I really feel that if somebody has a purpose in life, however trivial this may seem (looking after a beloved pet would count) then this tends to lessen the negative affect of the other difficulties.
Us baby boomers know that we will still be working till a ripe old age, but I do not necessarily think this is a bad thing. As long as we are able to work, I think we should be allowed to continue. Obviously a balance needs to be struck, and we should be mindful that we may not be able to do the same hours as we did in our 20s, but there is no reason to stop at 65 if we still feel able to carry on.
Society is changing, people are generally healthier and living for longer and the old days of getting the gold watch and then settling down in slippers to watch the snooker are well and truly over. Many retired people are finding that, even if they have their health and the support and companionship of a partner, unless they still feel a sense of usefulness (whatever form this may take) then something seems to be missing from their lives.
Evidently, the important thing is to strike a balance - to have time to relax and do those things that are enjoyable for us, and we know that in the case of the Queen it is her family and her love of her dogs and horses - but also to feel that we are still able to contribute to society in some way.
Best wishes to you all,
Wendy x
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