One of the most rewarding treatments that I carry out for people is for a fear of flying. A lovely lady who came to me some years ago had not flown for many years due to her last flight ending in an emergency landing. The resulting panic and chaos in which she remembered people screaming around her was embedded in her memory, and - although it had happened many years ago - still seemed like yesterday and was preventing her and her husband from enjoying their retirement to the full.
This is not surprising as recent research reveals that a traumatic accident which may have happened decades ago is often remembered as if it were a recent event, as well as those involved seeing other similar events in a more heightened and emotionally charged way.
A group of Canadians had been flying from Toronto to Lisbon on August 24th 2001 when their plane suddenly lost power because of a fuel leak. They plunged down towards the sea at 2,000 ft per minute but the pilot managed to land the plane safely at a small military base in the Azores. One of the passengers, a psychologist, decided to use the group's shared trauma for a the basis of an experiment into the effects of extreme distress on the brain. Almost a decade later the same passengers were put under an MRI scanner and shown coverage of their disaster as well as footage of 9/11 which, coincidentally, happened weeks later. It was found that the people who had experienced the incident had a much stronger emotional response to the trauma, as opposed to subjects who had not experienced such an event. They also 'remember the event as though it happened yesterday, when in fact it happened almost a decade ago.'
Hypnotherapy and NLP can rapidly and effectively break up the memory of this type of trauma, and I am consistently amazed (I've always been a bit of sceptic) by how well the treatment works, often in just a couple of sessions. To enable people to see all sorts of different wonderful places, people and cultures is such a privilege for me.
By the way, the husband of the lady who came to see me wishes she had never come for treatment. It's costing them a fortune ....
Wendy x
Wednesday, 24 June 2015
Sunday, 21 June 2015
De-cluttering
I have recently had a big clear out. This was prompted by new carpets being fitted throughout the whole house, the old ones being mostly laid bare by carpet moths, and so the new ones are polyester (sounds horrible but actually it looks and feels like the real thing and apparently the moths gag on it). Clients will be able to experience the luxury of the the new carpet as I have had my practice room done too. It all looks lovely.
The clearing out process, including the cupboard of fear - we've all got one of those havn't we? - was really quite cathartic, and I can feel a different, lighter energy in the house now. In the same way that our minds hold onto stuff which we really need and want to be rid of, we sometimes keep actual items which we no longer have any use for. However I did find that once I had started I tended to be much more brutal and my husband had to hold me back from throwing out things that we still wanted to keep (like a sofa or one of our children ... )
When taken to extremes it can be that you are either a person who hoards for England or one of those minimalist types who have everything painted white and no stuff at all. Of course the former can be a very serious issue and indicative of somebody who has been through loss or trauma and therefore finds comfort in filling their homes with all sorts of things which they really do not need. I do think that a bare home also indicates a certain mindset, and, as with everything a balance between the two is good. Sometimes we can be affected by our childhood home so if your mum was hoarder of every type of trinket, you may well go in the opposite direction when you have your own place.
Whatever you are - hoarder or de-clutterer - I like to think of hypnotherapy as a way to give the mind a good clear out, and what's amazing is that this process can happen without having to lug furniture around or clear out cupboards. One of the things that many clients tell me is how much more energetic they felt after a session, lighter and clearer headed. It may then be that a problem you have been struggling with for sometime suddenly becomes easy to solve, or you may just be aware of having more positive thoughts.
The moths are really cross now, by the way ....
Wendy x
The clearing out process, including the cupboard of fear - we've all got one of those havn't we? - was really quite cathartic, and I can feel a different, lighter energy in the house now. In the same way that our minds hold onto stuff which we really need and want to be rid of, we sometimes keep actual items which we no longer have any use for. However I did find that once I had started I tended to be much more brutal and my husband had to hold me back from throwing out things that we still wanted to keep (like a sofa or one of our children ... )
When taken to extremes it can be that you are either a person who hoards for England or one of those minimalist types who have everything painted white and no stuff at all. Of course the former can be a very serious issue and indicative of somebody who has been through loss or trauma and therefore finds comfort in filling their homes with all sorts of things which they really do not need. I do think that a bare home also indicates a certain mindset, and, as with everything a balance between the two is good. Sometimes we can be affected by our childhood home so if your mum was hoarder of every type of trinket, you may well go in the opposite direction when you have your own place.
Whatever you are - hoarder or de-clutterer - I like to think of hypnotherapy as a way to give the mind a good clear out, and what's amazing is that this process can happen without having to lug furniture around or clear out cupboards. One of the things that many clients tell me is how much more energetic they felt after a session, lighter and clearer headed. It may then be that a problem you have been struggling with for sometime suddenly becomes easy to solve, or you may just be aware of having more positive thoughts.
The moths are really cross now, by the way ....
Wendy x
Tuesday, 16 June 2015
Kneesy peasy
Otherwise fairly fit and healthy I am having a bit of trouble with my knees of late (might be an age thing) to the effect that they are no longer behaving as knees should, eg. bending, weight bearing etc. I am going to see a rheumatologist but have had blood tests which seem to indicate a lack of arthritis, which is very positive, but a bit of a mystery.
I do sometimes think that our bodies indicate to us when we are overloaded in all sorts of interesting ways and we need to listen and pay attention to what is going on. I remember seeing a client who had the most awful IBS after splitting from a partner, and had actually described how she felt as 'gutted'. The split was causing these very physical symptoms. The emotions that she felt were going directly to her stomach. Also, I heard of a chap who could not accept his son's sexuality when he found out he was gay, he found it actually distasteful and then developed a strange symptom in which he had the experience of an awful smell in his nose.
This type of thing serves to illustrate how the body and mind are so closely related. I have thought about my 'knee' business and although it may well be that an MRI reveals a mechanical fault, I do think that some stress that I had last year in which I almost felt I was having to carry some family members going through a difficult time caused me to buckle under the strain. This difficult time has fortunately passed now, although the knees still seem to be complaining. Perhaps it is my age after all!
Wendy x
I do sometimes think that our bodies indicate to us when we are overloaded in all sorts of interesting ways and we need to listen and pay attention to what is going on. I remember seeing a client who had the most awful IBS after splitting from a partner, and had actually described how she felt as 'gutted'. The split was causing these very physical symptoms. The emotions that she felt were going directly to her stomach. Also, I heard of a chap who could not accept his son's sexuality when he found out he was gay, he found it actually distasteful and then developed a strange symptom in which he had the experience of an awful smell in his nose.
This type of thing serves to illustrate how the body and mind are so closely related. I have thought about my 'knee' business and although it may well be that an MRI reveals a mechanical fault, I do think that some stress that I had last year in which I almost felt I was having to carry some family members going through a difficult time caused me to buckle under the strain. This difficult time has fortunately passed now, although the knees still seem to be complaining. Perhaps it is my age after all!
Wendy x
Monday, 8 June 2015
Depression in children and teenagers
I am so pleased that some schools are now opting to ban homework, and this is not just primary schools. Apparently Cheltenham Ladies College is doing away with 'prep' and also making sure that students have more relaxation time, including weekly meditation classes. I only hope that this begins a trend across both private and state schools. Given the increase in rates of depression in children and young people, it is essential that the whole country changes it's thinking in this way.
I have long felt that the amount of time a child is in school should be enough for them to be able to learn, and that home time should be just that - time at home to relax and unwind with the family. The demands on children and teenagers are so great now, that it is very important that they have some time to just 'be', away from the rigours of deadlines and school work. Of course, it is really important that this downtime is not spent just on smartphones or iPads, but that there is an encouragement to do other stuff too. But these need to be activities without structure, as endless clubs and sports commitments could end up being as tiresome and stressful as homework.
In many ways the world is a better place for youngsters now, much less bigotry and more freedom for people to be themselves, many more opportunities. However, by another token, there are so many more stressors on the young person, including the pressure to perform well at school, as well as all the other things such as body image, broken families, money and career worries, that we have to realise the importance of having the time and space to relax and just enjoy time at home.
I am mindful of the fact that many young people will be in the midst of exams at this time, so I'm sending my best wishes and thoughts to you all (and to your parents!) Take care.
Wendy x
I have long felt that the amount of time a child is in school should be enough for them to be able to learn, and that home time should be just that - time at home to relax and unwind with the family. The demands on children and teenagers are so great now, that it is very important that they have some time to just 'be', away from the rigours of deadlines and school work. Of course, it is really important that this downtime is not spent just on smartphones or iPads, but that there is an encouragement to do other stuff too. But these need to be activities without structure, as endless clubs and sports commitments could end up being as tiresome and stressful as homework.
In many ways the world is a better place for youngsters now, much less bigotry and more freedom for people to be themselves, many more opportunities. However, by another token, there are so many more stressors on the young person, including the pressure to perform well at school, as well as all the other things such as body image, broken families, money and career worries, that we have to realise the importance of having the time and space to relax and just enjoy time at home.
I am mindful of the fact that many young people will be in the midst of exams at this time, so I'm sending my best wishes and thoughts to you all (and to your parents!) Take care.
Wendy x
Wednesday, 3 June 2015
A passionate man
I was very sad to hear the news about Charles Kennedy, the Liberal Democrat MP, who died yesterday aged 55. We do not yet know the circumstances of his death but whatever the cause, it is certainly untimely.
Although a very successful parliamentarian as well as being a well-liked and genuine man, he battled with alcohol and bravely made this public knowledge a few years ago. The loss of his seat recently must have been devastating, after over 30 years as an MP, compounded by the recent death of his father who he cared for. His marriage had ended in 2005, although he was a doting dad to his little boy.
He was certainly a man of principle as evidenced by his passionate opposition to the Iraq war and he can be admired for this as, at the time, many around him were pro-war. Events since that time show that he was right in his belief that such action would ultimately lead to huge unrest, and anti-West fervour such as we now see with the Islamic State.
Sometimes it is said that people such as Charles Kennedy and other troubled souls like him see things all too clearly whilst the rest of us manage to find a way to 'rose tint' life, enabling us to function without the need for a crutch.
I hope that his family and friends find comfort in the outpouring of love and respect being expressed about this warm-hearted and genuine man.
Wendy x
Although a very successful parliamentarian as well as being a well-liked and genuine man, he battled with alcohol and bravely made this public knowledge a few years ago. The loss of his seat recently must have been devastating, after over 30 years as an MP, compounded by the recent death of his father who he cared for. His marriage had ended in 2005, although he was a doting dad to his little boy.
He was certainly a man of principle as evidenced by his passionate opposition to the Iraq war and he can be admired for this as, at the time, many around him were pro-war. Events since that time show that he was right in his belief that such action would ultimately lead to huge unrest, and anti-West fervour such as we now see with the Islamic State.
Sometimes it is said that people such as Charles Kennedy and other troubled souls like him see things all too clearly whilst the rest of us manage to find a way to 'rose tint' life, enabling us to function without the need for a crutch.
I hope that his family and friends find comfort in the outpouring of love and respect being expressed about this warm-hearted and genuine man.
Wendy x
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